say what you mean.....

I am the man of the spirit, don't you feel it
my soul cries out, can't you hear it
my works speak for me without me making a sound
listen to my character when you come around
i understand trust is hard to come by
but it is hard for me to lie
i have always been raised to say what you mean, and mean what you say
with some things you really should not play
people expect things from you after it is spoken
there is now a responsibility that you are hold'n
 Daddy said he was coming to get me today
i waited and waited, with him i wanted to play
i told God i would give him more time
WOE, something came up, God will you forgive me this time
if you can not do it, then do not let it come out of your mouth
There is enough pollution in the air, remember that before you let BS out
no one is perfect, but we are all equipped to be made aware
let your yes be yes, and no be no, before you make a vow, don't you dare
making a statement is just like a promise when you have another person expecting what was stated
intentions mean nothing when your promise was dated
be careful because in the end, it all becomes a lie, regardless what you meant to say or do
look back on many of your lies, and disappointments we have bestowed on someone else, that was all commited by..... YOU

Ride With Me

The word for today is progression....

PROGRESSION: to progress, to move to the next level. Movement from one
member of a continuous series to the next.

i find that we often stand stagnant,
sitting in one place vagrant
No interest in moving forward because of many pass happenings
Whether it is from a past hurt,
 a past experience, or just from being
flat out lazy
our minds end up bored and it becomes comfortable,
 but we end up going straight up crazy
Well I refuse to stand still and allow my present to stay as it is
a lot of times our dreams are often thought of, but ends up un-lived
money and love are the key factors of life, even though one ends up
shining over the other
never at the same place.
 one is usually more important than the other
nonetheless, this is how we factor life, so our hunt for happiness is
never ending
so now it begins, this tiring chase,
 but guess which one is winning
I tend to progress to the latter, or
which ever one i get the most profit
nevermore will i stand still waiting though.
 let's go and get it, so
we can say we got it
but being alone is not an option
and i would love to move on with you
But i will be moved by God, and God alone,
i just pray you are riding with me.

there is too much to live for,
 too much to hope for,
 too much to laugh about

too much to do just to sit around in this cage,
 looking silly like a monkey trying to get out...

i have a friend that came and He told me that he came here not for death,
but that we can have life,
and have life more abundantly

i can almost see my blessings in front of me

Love or money, both are huge, both a necessity to live

both are a blessing to have,
but only one of them will fade away,
the other remains a blessing to give

Love is that gift and a blessing,
 Love died so that i can be free.

i speak on it as much as i can
because this sacrifice that comes from love,
 i love it, because of the love of Love. I shall forever cherish it,
because love has certainly been good to me...
so ride with me, in love..... 

"xpressurself"

Life away from the City....

I have been reminded of what it is like to experience country life
Raw, and uncut, real true living minus the over rated hype.
To be able to just sit outside with a nice visual of the space that you got
No one complaining all damn day about it being too hot
Watching the animals run around, with not too many worries
Listening to the old folk tell about 307 different stories (most of them are the same stories he/ she told the day before)
Building a fire in the front yard, just to keep the bugs from ruining the party
If you have some food, at least 4 people, some music, and alcohol, then you have a successful party
Women sitting outside,(IN THE FRONT YARD) WITHOUT the worries of putting their hair on or in
Everyone damn near knows everyone, even if not, we are waving at the cars driving in
Not really giving a damn about who has more than the other
What I got, you got, we are all just like sisters and brothers..
Taking a hoe bath is like a daily thing, especially if you know you are not done with the day
You may either have to go back out to do more work, or maybe just go back out to play
NOW, most just may be a little behind on life, and some even out of touch with reality
Well for the city folk, that is just a formality.
Respect is a given, or there is an object to the head, coming flying through the air.
I dare a child to talk back to a grown-up,  oooohhhhh what a cross he/she will bare
Country living, some can do it, some will not, as for me, there is nothing more pure
Will I move back to the country, hands down, I would for sure….

"xpressurself"

I Would Have Been Just Fine

why did you come that day, i think i still would have been OK
minding my own business, chilling and drinking, no mood to play
was not interested in anyone in the place, didn't give a phuck about getting laid
just wanted to listen to the music that was playing, otherwise at home i would have stayed
ssssshhhhiiiiitttttt, i would have been alright just looking
i would have been just fine
i go to certain spots just for the music, but to get hitched and laid, i never waste my time
but hey, this is a day and the life of a nigga that gets exactly what he ask for
i remember praying for something specific, and my father in heaven, he gives me this and  more
standing up, rocking a bit to the groove that was surrounding the place
trying my damndest not to pay attention to the distraction that was in my face
yea i would have been OK just looking
i would have been just fine
but i did not take into account an attraction that was predestined, an attraction that was right on time.
i would have been OK, just looking... i would have been just fine....
before i was given a name or relation i walked in with you in my eye

Author Unknown......... Teach me to Speak****************************

The most powerful thing in the world, is the thing given to us by God himself, and it is the one thing that can lift us higher than the skies, and at the same time, destroys more things than a nuclear bomb has ever been capable of

One of the smaller members of the human body that can give us a sense of peace, fire of rage, or expression of joy and love.

The things that can range from one to plenty and could possibly mean the same thing

The giver of life, or the destroyer of life, the peace in the air, or the heartache despaired, the emotions in the songs we sing.

These things are words, and either written or spoken, the one thing that scares me, and the same thing that i have so many of that i have placed on mute

Afraid to express it, with the fear of being tested, because most of these words talk about the things i have gone through

Me writing this stuff is good for me, but what about those that need to hear this stuff; there may be someone at the edge of their peek

So I ask my father in Heaven to remove this fear of opening my mouth, for the sake of lifting others, would you please teach me to speak.....

For the longest time, i have been in Moses zone, making excuses why i should not open my mouth

People are being trapped in their little box, and are afraid to let themselves out.

Appearing to be strong, and they are only expressing a lie, and deep inside, they are actually weak

So I come to you in the name of Jesus, Lord please teach me to speak

So what if i have no one standing by my side as i express the truth,and/or opinions that reside in my heart

so what, If i bomb out the first time,  somewhere i've got to start

Whether on a stage the size of a dog house, or in the middle of the street

Lord I am asking you for the desire of my heart, open my mouth, and please teach me to speak

There are women in my heart that stay on my mind that have been physically and mentally raped, physically, and verbally abused by these BITCH made NOTHING ASS male figures

My dudes are angry and lost, dead men walking, because we had no liable father figure

The maestro,  Michelangelo came down and blessed us on earth with his crew dressed in black and blue creating a national masterpiece splashing the color of blood all over our streets

sometimes i feel like their only hope, but i need you Lord to teach me to speak

oh yea, i can make you laugh and stuff just to make you stop thinking about some things for a certain period of time

But that stuff always seem to come back, because it is still in their hearts, and WE are always looking for a sign

We have to fight Satan and ourselves, and it always seems that neither one of the two can be beat

But only if I could just speak a word from you, and with that, Lord i need you to teach me to speak

The one thing that challenges me, are the thoughts of everything that i have inside of me, and all that i have written from the inside of me, to just be erased and blown

I do not want to die with journals full of words, and be placed on a world stage, with salutation saying " Author unknown"

I only need a word from you God, so Father speak to my heart, allow me to decrease as you increase

And for the sake of those that need a word from  you, I only need you to teach me to speak..... 

"xpressurself"

The Death of a Sinner

He knew that time was coming, his mind and his heart was prepared

He was ready to do something, that only a few would have dared

He prayed for that moment, when his life mattered the most

That mirror he carried for the past 2 years, would soon carry his ghost

He laid down, tired… torn… weary… and scorned

Looking back over his life and realized, there will be many to mourn

Many things have been done to his spirit, to get him to this point

Actually happy about this day, he states “I’M UP OUT THIS JOINT”

His head lifts up, looking towards the sky, slowly going back, and back, and back

All of a sudden, everything is in slow motion, there was one person bracing, and the other was performing the act.

From the first sin, which was the time of his birth, to the day before his last mile

All of these things rushed in his mind, dang he had been in sin for a while

He never said goodbye to his homies, his family, his friends, nor anyone of utter importance

This was something he knew he had coming, and it was inevitable that he would be here with no utterance

His head finally felt something hit, but he had not yet been released to his destination

 Fear started to set in, and he was slightly paralyed, but this was his obligation

Why were there still thoughts being processed, I thought at impact this would all be done

Why aren’t I at my final destination, God and I should be one

Instead there was only a liner that has been peeled off and left behind

A part of him had been laid to rest,  then a part of him was carefully defined

You see, a man like this had done some things, and he figured this was the only way to make it right

This was the only way he knew to get out of that life,  and he did not put up a fight.

The Kingdom of God has won a new soul, washed and cleansed from his dirt and mess

He had accepted to be delivered, being washed by the blood of Christ, anyone that makes it that far is blessed

 There was a death to a sinner being performed to a man, right before my eyes

He came out of the water, refreshed, a new man, on a new path, for he had just been baptized....

"xpressurself"

i need a poem.....

i need a poem....
i need a poem that will see me when i am walking down the street and just want to stop...and come back just to tell me that it wants to get to know me.
yes... a poem
i need a poem that will express itself, giving me the sense of urgency to just listen;
speaking as though it has a passion to make sure that no detail is missing
i need a poem
i need a poem that will be as into me as i am into it.
spitting game at me with the reterick of a seductress, the only difference is, there is no bullshit.
Go ahead, i give you permission to mind fuck me........ make me wanna just melt like a little bitch
wrap me up with lyrics that will give me that ultimate erection from your dialect, and keep me that way until it hits that vein connected to my head making me so dumb founded, and that other vein to my feet will not want to do nothing but just....... sssshhhhhake.
to make the very conditioning of my loins just want to burst out with an eruption of mental stimulation

yea.... just a poem

i need a poem that will take the stress off of me so that i will not have to worry about making you continually intrigued with me, but have some of that come my way also.
Hell i need my ego massaged every once in a  while.
make me feel like a man and not a slave of ........ your beauty and sweet smell that will later turn me the hell off anyway.......
a poem is suppose to go both ways, and not only, i need, i need, i need. but what about, what can i do for you.
it is not always about you poem, but i need to be spoken to.
 i need to be ministered to,
 i may not WANT to be where you want me to be, i may need you to be where i am for a change.
don't judge me, at least give me the damn benefit of doubt, to hear what my heart has to say
i need a poem... to speak to me, not at me,
i need a poem that has placed the past where it is, in the rear view, but give me hope for the future.
i need to be able to breathe, with a poem of life, one that will set me free, allow me to be free, and allow me to know what it is to be me and to live...... free.....
it is said that when the soul feels like it is not free, it rebels.
so would you please give me a love, wait i meant a poem..... that is specially created... spoken...written.... for me
please..........

"xpressurself"

SO SWEET.... The Beast..... DAMN

There has always been this little statement made about me,
Oh wow Xpressurself... "YOU ARE SO SWEET"
In the beginning when everyone has been so busy with showing off their representative
I be who i be and i give what i am gonna give
I will do what i have to do just to ensure there is no issue as far as.....
starting any type of shit with me, showing off your ass
I know i am kinda drifting a bit, but what i am talking about is when a man and a woman first meet
no one is really themselves, everyone is sharp on their feet.
Well, this is I. I am the person that MOST ladies really do not want from the jump.
The really nice, free spirited, always willing to help and stuff....
  i.e. "AWE, YOU ARE SO SWEET"
UMMMM HMMM.....
I speak with a moderate tone, always doing something to make them laugh
laid back, always chilling....... you know free spirited, walking my own path
conversation good, keeping things going
My me side, keeping life flowing....
i tell you in the beginning, that i can be moody, but just not taking my mood out on anyone
when i want to be left alone, leave me alone, and my stink will soon be done
but some do not see it like that, they wanna come in and talk, and that is fine
but i am in a mood, meaning it may NOT be my thinking time
i will listen to you, smile, and converse back, just to keep things at bay
if i am in mood, i am totally nonchalant, meaning there is no telling what i may say
if you ask a question, and i do not see a need to massage your ego, the truth will disperse
do not ask if you do not want the truth, how many times does this have to rehearsed
so NOW you have an attitude, and you acting like a bitch
i am still in my little stink, it has only been 30 minutes, i really do not give a shit
so now you are talking to me like you have lost your mind, and LAWD KNOWS me like no other
why does he not prepare my beast...... why does he allow me to release my monster
my skin has began to peel, and my eyes spit fire from hell
all you had to do was just leave me alone for about and hour, leave me to myself
give me time to put on some Scarface, Tupac, Jay Z behind a Kanye beat
Lee Williams, Chester Baldwin, kirk Franklin, give me time to let the Lord speak to me
You truly did not like my being sweet, you insist on looking up at the Guerrilla
uh uh, do not be mad now, you asked for this beast..... Nigga
I will respect your space, and still be considerate, just to make sure you are alright
I will give you time to unwind, even vent if need be, because we all have that right
To know me is to get to know, learn who i really am
HEAR ME WHEN I TELL YOU ABOUT ME, LET ME... BE ME.... DAMN
"XpressURself"

From The Hands of The Potter ( Jer. 18:4)

I stood as a man with all that i needed, and wanted for a season of my life
I had a vehicle, house, money out the ass, even blessed with a beautiful wife
I stood as a man with nothing to want for, but much more would really not hurt
But i was not a greedy man, so please understand i took life just as it was worth
I began to gain weight as a married man, and when people would come to ask me
They would say, marriage does you well dude, you getting kinda fat,  and i would always respond while rubbing my belly, this is not fat, this is what i called happy.
That was the life for me, me being the King in my castle, she the Queen in my life
wwwooowww, the whole thought of ME being married, ME having a wife
I can not explain what the deal was, or even how the end started to come nigh
Not sure when the sudden change in life occurred, but never thought to ask the question why?
We did our thing though, and kept it moving as we saw fit
O.M.G., we were loved together by others, but I guess the enemy did not like it
Nonetheless, at some point, it went on a spiral plunge to the worst, and life happened
Needless to say, this is not the way i ever thought nor imagined.
when the end happened, the tunnel to a new beginning was on the prowl
i did  something that tore me up, and made me realize that life is really not all that fowl
I fasted and prayed in the midst of being depressed, i asked God to show me my faults
Show me where I failed, and what should i have done, show me what foolishness, i myself, had brought
One thing I have learned, is ONLY ask God for what you really want him to do, and the other stuff, i should have let it go
There were several things about myself that i regret that i did not know
He knew what attracted me, and what caught my attention, and what i would open my mind to
I started looking at myself in the mirror almost daily,  and even though i had knowledge and wisdom, i REALLY had no clue
I had become broken to the thought that i was who i was, and what i had become
Why on earth did no one bring these things to my attention when i asked, where did this stuff come from
i had become marred, broken, twisted, confused, wanted to just say F-it to it all
Let me just isolate myself, and do what i do, and if i fall, then i just fall
I cried out to God, and i fussed at God, and i calmed down and asked him to make a new me
I told him i needed to become the man, leader, Husband that he wanted me to be.
I asked him for another opportunity, and each time i thought that time was here
He moved me around... and around... and around to another side of me that I did not want to hear.
So now i am here, at the spot that i am in, still being molded, and tested, but instead of switching vessels, he is only polishing this old ship i sailed up in.
He knows what he made, he knows who i am, so he kept those things that he had already put in place
That other MESS that i accumulated, he viewed as dirt, while I looked at MYSELF as a disgrace.
I can still see the hand of God placing his hands around me, applying pressure, with force squeezing me.... mending me.... stretching me.... still loving me.... showing me the light to when he will be relieving me
You see, he is not done with me yet, as a matter of fact, i am touched by the thought of being in the hands of the Potter's
i have been through the ice, of being cold and alone, while going through the heat, as the fire of life got hotter and hotter
i have been taken out of the fire, now i am being cooled, and as you know it takes time for the molding to dry
So, now comes the patience, as i sit and observe all the things i have learned on the way, with ALL FAITH that i have GOD RIGHT BY MY SIDE
the molding is not of a perfect appearance, but because of my tribulations, that appearance matters none
he has worked on the man, then on the leader, now the last one is in the making, and again, my life, will once again be begun.... Thanks to the hand of the Potter..... and He said it is good with Him...
"xpressurself"

Say Something

Go ahead and let’s talk about this, because this is something that needs to be mentioned

This conversation should be amongst the top stories of LIFE, for no other reason

I am a witness of being a statistic of being raise by a mother on her own

Only I have been protected the first years of my life, at such a time, she was not totally alone.

I cannot take all of the credit away from my dad though, because he was there for the early part of our life

But the time that I most needed a man to teach me to be a man, he was MIA, even there as she patiently, and painfully sat and eventually ended the reign as his wife

men have a lot to say about silly and dumb shit, that really makes no sense, or is of no importance to anyone, and are constantly trying to take over their hood.

speaking about the last chic they screwed, that last item that was purchased, and there is nothing wrong with that, hell that is all good

TO THE FELLAS.... let's say something that matters,

say something about the struggle of a mother, being the only one to take care of something that it took two to make

Having to figure out how to move forward in life, taking the bullshit she has to take

say something........ about having to live as two individuals, that most of us have such a hard time living as one

Raising a girl for a woman, is not too hard, but add on the uncertainty and unknown wisdom of having to raise a son

Some say it is not possible for a woman to raise a man, ssshhhiiitttt, you must not have met the women that I have seen do it

Yes, it takes a village to raise a child, well true that, but to witness some strong women do it

to all of my real dudes and you nothing ass niggas.... say something

about a woman making $20 stretch to purchase $95 worth of food

Getting up, making sure the kids are up to go to school, making them lunch, getting them out of the house, then to go to work doing what she got to do

not giving 2 shits about the fraud ass niggas that are noticing her struggle

having to deal with the “hey ma’s, ey you’s, and the woe daaaaaaamn baby’s” as she refuses to give a rebuttal

I thank God my mother taught me how to not take shit from a chic

How to be careful and stay away from the riff raffs, you see my dad was not there for that shit

She taught me the simple things like the right way to shake a man’s hand

How to be respectful to everyone, even if they are not necessarily respectful to you (I am still working on that one, but hell it was a lesson....... that was given..... to be learned..... iamjustsaying)

She always taught me a lot of things which at that time, I really did not understand

ACTUALLY I really did not get it until I finally became a man

my mother prayed for assistance, and God sent her some women that literally took on that task

of helping my mom in doing what was needed most, help in raising my throw-ed off ass

I will not get too much into it, but to all of the single women that is doing what you do, 2^nd to God, I give you thanks and a standing ovation.

Behind the stress that you deal with, the disappointments, and constant frustrations

The baby daddy drama, your PHUCKED up attitude for whatever that attitude is for

I give you much love and respect, for the things you do, the BS you deal with, and I know it is much more

I thank God for looking after you and your mental state, keeping you sane and so much stronger than us

I got nothing but respect for you, keep doing what you do, because I know, we can do a lot more, we certainly do not do enough.

“xpressurself”

another one gone.

that topic came up again, but no one really paid attention

like for the ump...teenth time, he made it a point to mention

everything that was on his mind, all good and bad intentions

and through all that heard his cry, there was still no type of intervention

it was pushed under a rug as if no one heard of his mission

i mean did anyone really need his permission

now his blood is on all of your hands because you pretty much allowed him to make the incision

this dude was smart and intelligent, becoming a sophmore in high school was revelent
unfortunately, got connected with the wrong group of guys, and got this female pregnant
but of course it was an accident and you and his new friends commense to mock him as ignorant
to make a long story short, you did not listen when he insisted he was contemplating taking his own life
instead of saying a few words, or letting someone know, you just allowed him to go....
but i digress, that was not your fight, nor your right to get involved
who knows though, there is that possibility that his issue could have been resolved
but that was his decision, he could have went another way
and what would have changed his mind, what could you possibly say.
how about.... GOD loves you more than anything and taking your life is not the way
You have so much to live for, come with me and let's pray
even just listening to what he had to say, giving him some time, though you didn't have to, but again that is not  your business
you were only a witness


we often walk away from a person because we are never wanting to get involved. But we will certainly judge after the fact. And we are considered Christians.... SMH....
REALLY???
"xpressurself"

On the skin.... it is just a test

On the skin, there lies wounds that may never be healed…
 wants and needs not fulfilled…

A soul that is probably already killed…..
 with an enemy lurking that is perfectly skilled

Able to lay away for the perfect timing…
 wait for the attack as feelings and emotions, with finally a sense of total excitement are continually climbing

To heights unknown by any man, woman, nor child…
 yet the stench from the garbage of yesterday surfaces at will, while being covered by confusion and lies from the wild

Even though those ties have been broken….
 How can it rest when it is constantly being spoken?

Trust issues arise…. Things will never be the same…
 regardless how much leverage is gained

A seed has been planted, and the bush began to grow…
 there is nothing that can be done with that, except to wait and to be shown

What place is this that I sit and wait…
 Do not tell me this is where you belong as you slowly operate by hate

There are several places that you feel you must be….
Stop wasting your time if you feel you must be free

Go now birdy take your last flight….
 Go as far as you can, as you reach new heights

Just promise that place where you left your eggs…
 that you will not return, use your wings not your legs

God has given you that ability to lift off and fly…..
please do not look back, and I will not ask why

Little birdy you have escaped so much harm in your past….
 Fly away little birdy, you are free alas.

No more harm will hold you down never more….
 Go in peace and  explore ever more, forever more….

To sit at the top of the tree is usually the safest place…
to sit and chill with no haste

But just fly little birdy and find  your place in life…
 stay away from the storm, it will only cause strife

As you fly to your destination, find a safe haven to rest…..
 you are still at your  beginning stage, and this is just a test…..

...........

what is the basis of the things that you speak of
you try to make sense, but that is impossible when speak of love
is there anything else that makes you think for a change
running all around, totally deranged
having to wait around when you know you messed up
given an altermatum that you know is not sticky stuck
i mean you do what you are asked, and things  still do not work
you should have fixed some things from the beginning, instead of being a jerk
the reality is here, of what is to become
what is to come? karma is a bitch, and she will come.
"xpressurself"

I am trying...... it really does not matter

Father i am trying to be patient, and I am trying

but the urge is too strong for me, and there is no need in denying

Even when she is not in my eyesight i smell her scent

when i look around, to search for her, once again i am wondering where she went

i have spent a great deal of my life with distractions that i incurred on my own

and each time you come around, there goes another, and when i look up each time you are gone

God sends you back around for a reason

Even now, i really do not understand, but dammit I am definitely listening

now, i have prayed for many things, and each time i have received

This is one thing I thought wouldn’t even be a thought because of the time between

Now you have placed me in positions where i have learned who I am

Finally I know what i am to do, my purpose in life, but why now, i mean mmmaaannn

Yes you have given me my assignment, and you have taught me patience to the 5th power

you have taught me how and when to silence myself, and to stop trying to be the man of the hour

I have always known how to accept the good with the bad

to get what I get and take care of it, no matter what it is i had

God I am asking you to grant me my life with what i have encountered for close to 20 years

grant me the excitement and calmness that i feel EACH time she comes near

This is the only woman that i can honestly say that I would snatch my frik’n heart out and give it to her is she needed it

and would not even worry about replacing it

what i have which is not much is all for her

her  mistakes, issues, her situation i will not take it, but together we will deal with it

hell i will help you with that monkey, but i will not invest it

I mean, we made our own individual beds, but i do not see why we cannot lie on that mattress together

We can fight this shit, whenever, however, forever

I am just praying God allows us to do it..... TOGETHER...... HOWEVER... WHENEVER.... TOGETHER....

with blood sweat and tears..... To me, it really does not matter

A time of change..... in Love

Thank you father.... i thank you for your many mercies that you have given each day… the many times i have messed up in your eyes by not doing the things that i would say… I pray…. In the near future I want to get an understanding of why things happen the way they do… why is it I can’t focus more on my assignment, which has come from you… Now father, I really do not want to talk, but if it is ok, I would just like to vent for a second… just to tell you some things that have been on my mind, and I reckon, that while I am releasing some much held on aggression, it just makes sense to go ahead and have a “come unto Jesus” session……. Ever since my separation and divorce I never gave myself a chance, to dance on my own and allow myself to lead ME, and re-direct my life plans. I wanted to act out for a while, and show my butt, and just be Van. I never did that, as a matter of fact I stayed in my marriage program, being cool as a fan, something many will never understand. But I am a man, nigga get on out there and do what you do, this is what they are expecting from you, I just could not get myself to carry it through.  Still programmed with the things that was deposited from wedlock, I got all these big ideas of focusing on this proposition of having my own, doing my own, and being able to do these things ON my own… well, long story short, I am still in it, hard to stay focused, but I do plan to win it. I am on the right track, I have passed the beginning. Many distractions I faced, and love I embraced. Love feeling sssoooo good, after I actually got a taste .i mean I loved Love, and I still do for it has been so good to me. It showed me its many forms, and love showed me some things about me.  So I became an advocate of love, loving the whole meaning of its being. And I saw that it was not sex being the pulling wheel, but just believing. I realized that love was my distraction from moving me in your direction. Love became my other god, now I stand before you in submission. And with your permission, I ask that I be forgiven for placing you second. You were my first love, that should have never been replaced, and as for me, I reckon there is a section in your word, that I need to pay more attention to. The 4th verse to Revelation 2…. To be continued…..

Exclusive.... Exclusively... ***

The poet spoke, but was not heard.
So many things going on at once, with no understanding of
What is happening to himself.
So he instead, insists on not saying a word.
Life has come at many angles,
as this has been one ride after another.
The fact of the matter is he does want to see him
But, does not want the fight of life any more...
I just don't want to be the reason for the pain,
Because, of the thoughts of believing in another
So don't bother.
He kept you close, with a mighty fight
He didn't keep trying just to have you run away,
But without you, it just does not seem right.
You came into his existence at a time
When he needed you the most.
You did something,
To his way of thinking,
That encouraged me to accept love in the open.
Now, i am hoping.
I hope there can be some type of rekindling for his soul,
Because he has been broken.
And coming back to reality is inevitable, though
It may just take a little more time than it was originally factored...
But the hassle is worth the fight...
Even unto death...
Yes even unto death...
I mean after all you died.... for US.
And you came back , and a different person he was.
But right now i there is no more fight left.
He came back beating down your door,
And now he sits in his own sorrow,
Today, praying there is forever, a tomorrow
And a place of where he needs to be.
You died for me, him, US, so please,
 allow me, him, US to live for you.....

"xpressurself"
9/4/2011