I am that..... a Man.... (“DEPENDABILITY”)

I thought I was built to be the stronger person, the one that was there when no one else was

The person that kept things going even when it looked like all hope was lost

Through a lot of heartache, laughter, tears, and misunderstandings, I did what needed to be done

But then when things got entirely too demanding and the real battle had begun

I had thoughts of giving up, even when my stubborn ass was dead set on completing what I started

It is like I lost focus because of what was in front of me, while looking at everyone else being ice hearted

YOU stepped in and observed for a minute, YOU looked at the look on my face

Looking at the conditions of where I stood, standing in my own dry spirit trying to fill this dead space.

I still wanted to do it on my own, and I looked for ME to get it done

I did not need to be anyone’s charity case; I was the only male, my mom’s only son.

I mean, to prove I could do it, this was a role I needed, I could do it if I did nothing else

OH how proud I would make the others, if I did this by myself.

But, still YOU watched, YOU observed, YOU focused, never leaving me on my own

Although YOU never stepped in to save me, your presence was always known

After so long I finally got to the point where I was losing this crazy fight

Everything I was wanting to do by myself ended all at once, in one night

I got helpless, and felt like I was nothing because of the mistakes that I would make

Things I did, as my mother looked on, and after the first time I saw her tears; at that moment I had to break

I fell to myself, but did not look to myself, but I called YOU for the first time in this situation.

I called YOU, and almost before I started the first word to my last sentence, YOU had me in deep consecration

For the first time, I had a total mindset to depend on the one I should have called on from the jump

YOU showed up, and YOU showed out, and YOU made your statement, telling me enough was enough.

YOU made the issues go away, my confusion was at rest, YOU totally came through

And you did just what you always do when i finally decided to depend on YOU.
I am human indeed, I a your creation, I am stubbornness above what any other human can understand.
I never was able to get it right the first time, i am selfishness, I am that I am..... a man.... 

"xpressurself"

"Sigh of Relief"

There was a long pause in the middle of the Lake, and the only thing I found myself doing was sitting there so I could get a good listen

I watched, as the sun rays just sat on the top of the water, and I was in awe by the way the reflection glistened.

I talked to the water as if it had a soul, but later found out that indeed it did

A huge smile came across my face, and I became extremely giddy, you could have sworn I instantly became a kid

I saw the Glory of what was in front of me, and never paid attention in the months before

My eagerness to receive it, grew bigger and bigger, making me yearn for it more and more and more

If I never saw anything else, or witnessed what was before my presence

I would never be able to testify about its glorious essence

The water had such a spirit about it that made me WANT to be around it daily

I asked God if he could make this happen, down and simply said “SURELY”

Are you worthy to have what I have to give you, will you cherish it the way it needs to be cherished

I have something far more intriguing, and beautiful, and only needs to be nourished

There is this spirit of love, devotion, and the confirmation is all in the air

God gave me what I asked for, and I will be DAMNED if I mess this up, and let it go anywhere

The water was good, but this spirit of God’s love is priceless and can NEVER be replaced of duplicated

No one or anything can get in the middle of this thing I was given, for I earnestly supplicated

Well HE gave it to me, I have received it, and it is in my heart… nothing else matters to me

(big inhale real slow…. Big exhale real slow) OH what a joy, and a sigh of relief……….

“xpressurself”

My Responsibility.... No Longer in Me...

Walked in the courtroom and my knees buckled

I faced the prosecutor

And the executioner

And I was asked, did I do it

Did I have a past that I truly regret

Did I do and say things that would force

me to lose my respect

HOT DAMMIT, I did it I tell you, it was me I admit it, now leave me the hell alone

My past is just that, my past so please stop handing me back my old bones.

I want to beat you with it, slap the hell out of you with my skeletons that I am trying to hide

But your egotistical, holier than thou ass just will not allow me to leave my past behind

It was me that ravaged that beautiful tall glass of water, I swear it, but she begged me to

Now what type of man would I be if I did not oblige, come on now, what else was I to do.

She was standing there looking all watery, and vulnerable, and she just wanted to be held

I felt bad in the beginning, but I did that, I hit that, did I like her or love her, a player will never tell???

I did what I did, and it was what it was, I mean her sister should not have been talking about it

If she never would have opened her mouth, she never would have known about it

HUH? WHAT? WHAT EVER DOTH THOU MEANETH????

All of the dirt I did in the past, it is up to me to clean it.

Yea I triggered a dude, he was being rude, and I only asked him to PLEASE not stand so close

He looked at me looking at him, could I have moved away….. yyyeeeeaaahhhh I suppose

I WAS THERE FIRST DAMMIT, I WAS ALREADY IN PLACE.

He pushed me, and I only aimed it his way, I was not TRYING to hit him in the face

What do you mean just let it go, I would if folk would let me

I hear about my past actions daily, I wish all of they asses would just forget me

I put that CD back in its spot, I never walked out of the store, I would not have gotten far

I was only riding with those dudes, I did not help them break into those cars,

Yea, that drag from the Mary J. got into my blood, but I never took a puff

OK, OK, PLEASE STOP…. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

I know, it is my responsibility to change if I want change, and change is my main option

My past will never go away, it will never be forgotten

This is a new day of living and this is a different me

Running up in a sexy fine chic just because, no longer is that me

Running with the goons at night, no longer is that me………

Smoking that Dro is long gone, no longer is that me….

My lonely days of solitude, no longer is that me…

Being just so damn rude, no longer is that “totally” me… iamjustsaying…

Being over sensitive, upset for no reason, no longer is that me…

I must show that I am capable of being responsible and disciplined if I am to be the man that I am trying to be

There are many who act as if they are NOT watching me….

I must stand as a man, so please understand that this new way of living is different for me..

it was me I admit it, now leave me the hell alone, and let me now be who God has called me to be….

Aborted Opportunity..... Non-Existant......******* (something will fit, find it )

Hello you,
I just wanted to say hi.... I have been thinking about you a lot lately
The hopes i had of our union have been vexing my soul greatly
I remember those possibilities i had of actually holding you in my arms
though it was brief, yet real at time, i still hold that feeling; strong
i see your face and what it would have looked like, if your existence would have just came true
but it remains only that, a vision....a perfect imaginary image of you
i loved you even though i have never touched you, for my admiration unlike you, is so real
Only God knows how i feel. i am not sure how i should feel. i do not like how i feel
 i am not getting any younger, but i have nothing to show for my life
I have been able to touch most things i have yearned so long for, and it was nice
The one thing that i crave is the one thing i have yet to have
where is my cradle, my up in the middle of the nights, my tickle me elmo bubble bath
i see daily how many of these chicken shit ass bastards negate the most precious thing known to man
i have watched how, upon creation, their destiny as men and fathers tend to fall short of God's plan
Though a man like me has to accept the broken pathway of Queens decisions to self abort life as if it was her decision to make.
God's will is God's will, and it is a pathway i am forced to take
so I will.... humbly, with animosity for my first real chance that i once had
so sad... it could have happened, it should have happened..... it didn;t happen... so, so, so, sad
but it still seems like the joke was all on me....nonetheless, i still, only just wanted to say hello,
though i have never seen you, or experienced you mere existence..... i still miss you. and i do love you 

though you were never born....
"xpressurself"

Father do you hear me?????????

Father can you hear me,
i whisper this prayer to you
not that i am trying to be silent
but my humility is overdue
i laid in bed alone last night
and i awakened covered with your spirit
i felt it dettaching itself from me
and it spoke, i just could not hear it
i felt it and sensed it speaking
but there was just no tone
immediately i blinked
but when my eyes reopened, he was gone
Father can you hear me
PLEASE tell me what does this mean
what was your spirit trying to tell me?
Father speak your word, direct my path,
send me your blessed word
is it because my sins have blocked my hearing
God have i finally gotten on your nerves?
My life has changed for the better
though it still seems i am still in this ditch
what on earth could it be
MY CHILD, NONE OF THAT IS IT.
I HAVE GIVEN YOU WHAT YOU HAVE ASKED
YET YOU STILL TRY TO REMAIN MILD AND MEEK
YOU HAVE HAD THE OPPORTUNITY FOR LOVE,
FINANCES TWEEKED, AND YOU HAVE EVEN ASKED ME TO TEACH YOU TO SPEAK
YET YOU TALK WHEN YOUR PURPOSE IS SERVED
AND YOU EVEN GET JIGGY WITH IT EVERY THEN AND NOW
YET YOU ARE STILL WAITING ON SOMETHING
AND I HAVE NO EARTHLY IDEA WHAT IT IS NOW
TAKE WHAT I HAVE GIVEN YOU FIRST
AND DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO
THERE ARE MANY MORE THINGS THAT I HAVE
IN STORE JUST FOR YOU
 YOU HAVE SAID TO ME: "yes Lord,
Lord, I will certainly do your will"
THE IDEA SOUNDS REALLY GOOD DOESN'T IT
JUST SAYING IT SEEMS LIKE A THRILL
MAKE YOUR VOW, BUT KEEP YOUR VOW
AND MANY OTHER THINGS WILL BE ADDED TO  YOU
YOU KEEP ASKING ME DO I HEAR YOU,
JUST LIKE ALWAYS MY SON, INDEED,
 INDEED, INDEED I DO...
"xpressurself"

Piracy....

If you look deep enough, you can see them from along the shore

Slowly from the other side of the deep, midst, the pages of thick gore

Sailing with a mission, mind ready, with the game face…. Pacing

Jumping up and down where they stand, heart beat steady racing

Yet calm……………
 some of them you know they are barely moving

Waiting till they get clossssseeeeerrrrr…..  mentally drooling…

Tension all around so thick, with evil all across their hearts

Ready to pounce……. That is how it will all start

Now here is the irony, a smart person would see something so strange

And head the hell the other way

But folk these days, will get caught with curiosity, and so choose to stay

But the appearance is so intriguing, and borderline sexy

“Let’s wait a little bit longer, let it get next to me”

Have every opportunity to get the away

But instead….. we stay

Now on the other side, there is no particular leader, it is every person for themselves

Of course, taking things that they can hold for collateral, or things to just straight sell

MOST times, it is a matter of just taking, just to take. There is no such thing as privacy

Sshhhiiitttt, this is straight piracy nigga…
And these days, they are not necessarily on a boat, or a ship

Not holding weapons, and things of such on their hip.

Ladies, these days they are in 3 pc suits, nice whips, a good smile, and decent conversation

These dudes can say only a few words, and make you lose your concentration

and to my dudes, they come with a pair of titties, a nice ass, and CLAIM to have their own shit

Which part did you not get???

Even after you tell them you have nothing, they will see what they can get for themselves

Even if it is nothing more than you taking a trip with them, first class to hell

Pockets will not come up empty; they will certainly take something away

A true pirate, will never waste too much time in the same place, they have no reason to stay

You just got bamboozled, hoodwinked, profiled, mis-tooken by sexy foolery

These niggas and chicks are ruthless, and they know what they are doing, so be safe, cuz this shit ain’t new to me…

Hell, being too nice ain’t what you wanna do; you better make them respect your gangsta

You better damn well believe, they will without a doubt hang ya…

“Xpressurself”

Never Alone....

THIS HAS CERTAINLY BEEN ONE OF THOSE DAYS.........

He promised never to leave me, never to leave me alone
no never alone, no never alone....
He promised never to leave me, never to leave me alone....
so did you....
I was told, "i will not walk out on you", i will not do that to you
you told me that you would stay and try to work things out before we said we were through.
i heard that, and i kept my promise when i said i would work on my communication too
to keep my house in order, i would do what i needed to do
i was working my phucking ass off, but that was not enough for you
life has been rough, and KARMA is no punk, it exist, and it hurts like hell, let me tell you
but i will keep marching on, pressing forward until my work here is through
Will continue to have God on my entire person, but this time i will obey paying attention to HIS clues
paying HIS dues, and as much as i can, i will follow HIS rules
Karma has me sitting up here singing the blues
My past is running full circle, and is sticking to my soul like glue
I know i am being really broad right now, but God and i know the truth
those that have left me by the wayside, i can not have the hatred of a fool
i realize i just did not belong in their circle in this season, and that is all cool
i just have to shake this feeling, dodge this bullet, and do what i have to do
kick rocks, and keep my mind and feet on the move
Praising HIM for what i still have, and what i will retain, and the other things i will probably lose
I am Kingdom bound, and HE is hard on my side, and will be until HE comes back, which is soon... and very soon
For HE promised never to leave me, like him, like her, and like you....
"xpressurself"

DO THE WORK.....

JUST CALL ME THE RUBBERBAND MAN. IF YOU CAN
WILL ONE EVER BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND
THAT I AM JUST A MAN.

IMAGINE FEELING LIKE YOU ARE BEING PULLED LIKE 5 DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS
AND ALL THAT YOU DO, HAS TO BE DONE TO PERFECTION
THIS IS IF YOU ARE LIVING TO ANOTHER PERSON'S EXPECTANTS

AND JUST THINK THAT YOU ARE PASSIONATE ABOUT GETTING IT ALL DONE
YOU WANT TO MAKE IT ENJOYABLE, BUT IT ISN'T AT ALL FUN
WEARING 5 HATS AT SEPARATE LOCATIONS AND STILL REALIZING THAT YOU ARE BUT ONE

STILL TRYING TO PRESS TO MAKE THE MARK
CONSTANTLY PAUSING, RUNNING BACK TO THE START
THOUGH I DO ALL THIS SHIT FROM MY HEART

THIS MUZZLED OX, YET PLOWS THE FIELD
RESOURCES ARE FEW, YET WITH SO MUCH TO BUILD
AND IT HAPPENED, JUST NOW, LIFE JUST GOT REAL...

I REALIZE GOD HAS BEEN PUSHED FURTHER AND FURTHER BACK
YET I MUST KEEP MY CRAP IN TACT
NOT ONLY AM I NEEDING PEACE, IT HAS JUST BEEN REVEALED I COULD BE LEFT ALONE LIKE THAT.....

MY VERBAL WEAKNESS HAS JUST BEEN MADE AN ISSUE
NOW I HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT EXPRESSING MYSELF MORE TO YOU
BECAUSE OF LIFES SITUATIONS,  NOW WHAT DO I DO

I HAVE BEEN HUMBLED BECAUSE OF MY PAST HURTS
NOW THIS SHIT COMES UP, GREAT TIMING FROM THE DIRT
BUT GOD REVEALED TO ME TO  WORRY NOT, JUST DO THE WORK

NOW ANOTHER FAITH ISSUE, IS THIS EVEN WORTH A THOUGHT
BUT I PROMISED TO START LEARNING TO LISTEN TO GOD
I WILL NOT HAVE TWO MASTERS, MY LIFE HAS ALREADY BEEN BOUGHT

GOD TOLD ME TO JUST DO THE WORK, AND IT WAS SO CLEAR
WITHOUT WORRY, OR ATTITUDE, OR WEARINESS, OR FEAR
GOD IS WITH ME, HE IS AND HAS ALWAYS BEEN NEAR......

ALL I HAVE TO DO, IS JUST DO WHAT MUST BE DONE
ALLOW GOD TO LEAD MY LIFE, FOR IT IS FOR HIM AND THE SON
I WILL JUST COUNT IT ALL JOY, AND FOR MY SAVIOR, JUST" RUN FOREST RUN"
"XPRESSURSELF"

Stand As A Man.......

Hi, hello, HOW ARE YOU
I come before you, because i yearn to
But, i stand as a man with a lot on his chest
unable to lie down to get the appropriate rest
I am constantly running around simply for the sake of others
i take in a lot, because those are my orders
To fear the Lord thy God, and be there for others
The kids, the seasoned, my sisters and brothers
stand for what is right, and be blameless with my actions
Do what i have to do, but do it in an orderly fashion
I am here on this earth, strictly for service
stand bold on the Word of God, but why do i seem so nervous
I have become anxious, and weary, drowning in sorrow
My heart is very heavy , at times dreading tomorrow
not knowing what is coming, i mean what is coming ahead
God reminds me often "SON JUST DO WHAT I SAID"
"STAND STRONG, STAND STILL, STAND FIRM ON MY WORD"
Father i heard your command, every word I've heard
But i am human, and i am holding on to all i have received
Every word that has been granted me by others, believe i have received
I give it all to you, and i walk away clear
But what about me and my fear and my tears
Father you have granted me dominion over all of the Earth
and I have been beaten, degraded, and been derailed of my worth
Our women and children are lost, and needing us to stand
but how can i come back from being belittled as a man
The world is on my shoulders, and seem to have already failed
God i am needing your power, and grace so that I can prevail
God though i am a man, i get weak sometimes
so many are depending on me, and its either their life or mne
I truly need a word from you, i bid you to hear my voice
Examine my heart, God I rejoice, rejoice.
speak to me God, for i am willing step out of my own
Decreasing as you increase, but i will NOT go alone
"MAN SHOULD ALWAYS PRAY
I WILL BE WITH YOU THE REST OF YOUR DAYS"
YOUR SOUL IS RESTORED BY THE STILL WATERS, AND FROM THE GREEN PASTURES,  SO GET REST"
NOW STAND AS A MAN, WITH YOUR BURDENS ON MY CHEST"
SON I GOT YOU, GO AND STAND WITH YOUR FEET FIRM AND STILL
FOR IT IS BETTER TO OBEY THAN SACRIFICE, SO DO MY WILL.
YOU WILL NOT HAVE TO FIGHT THIS BATTLE, FOR I SEE YOUR HEART IS OPEN
FEAR NOT, NOR BE DISMAYED,  FOR THE LORD THY GOD HAS SPOKEN
"xpressurself"

say what you mean.....

I am the man of the spirit, don't you feel it
my soul cries out, can't you hear it
my works speak for me without me making a sound
listen to my character when you come around
i understand trust is hard to come by
but it is hard for me to lie
i have always been raised to say what you mean, and mean what you say
with some things you really should not play
people expect things from you after it is spoken
there is now a responsibility that you are hold'n
 Daddy said he was coming to get me today
i waited and waited, with him i wanted to play
i told God i would give him more time
WOE, something came up, God will you forgive me this time
if you can not do it, then do not let it come out of your mouth
There is enough pollution in the air, remember that before you let BS out
no one is perfect, but we are all equipped to be made aware
let your yes be yes, and no be no, before you make a vow, don't you dare
making a statement is just like a promise when you have another person expecting what was stated
intentions mean nothing when your promise was dated
be careful because in the end, it all becomes a lie, regardless what you meant to say or do
look back on many of your lies, and disappointments we have bestowed on someone else, that was all commited by..... YOU

Ride With Me

The word for today is progression....

PROGRESSION: to progress, to move to the next level. Movement from one
member of a continuous series to the next.

i find that we often stand stagnant,
sitting in one place vagrant
No interest in moving forward because of many pass happenings
Whether it is from a past hurt,
 a past experience, or just from being
flat out lazy
our minds end up bored and it becomes comfortable,
 but we end up going straight up crazy
Well I refuse to stand still and allow my present to stay as it is
a lot of times our dreams are often thought of, but ends up un-lived
money and love are the key factors of life, even though one ends up
shining over the other
never at the same place.
 one is usually more important than the other
nonetheless, this is how we factor life, so our hunt for happiness is
never ending
so now it begins, this tiring chase,
 but guess which one is winning
I tend to progress to the latter, or
which ever one i get the most profit
nevermore will i stand still waiting though.
 let's go and get it, so
we can say we got it
but being alone is not an option
and i would love to move on with you
But i will be moved by God, and God alone,
i just pray you are riding with me.

there is too much to live for,
 too much to hope for,
 too much to laugh about

too much to do just to sit around in this cage,
 looking silly like a monkey trying to get out...

i have a friend that came and He told me that he came here not for death,
but that we can have life,
and have life more abundantly

i can almost see my blessings in front of me

Love or money, both are huge, both a necessity to live

both are a blessing to have,
but only one of them will fade away,
the other remains a blessing to give

Love is that gift and a blessing,
 Love died so that i can be free.

i speak on it as much as i can
because this sacrifice that comes from love,
 i love it, because of the love of Love. I shall forever cherish it,
because love has certainly been good to me...
so ride with me, in love..... 

"xpressurself"

Life away from the City....

I have been reminded of what it is like to experience country life
Raw, and uncut, real true living minus the over rated hype.
To be able to just sit outside with a nice visual of the space that you got
No one complaining all damn day about it being too hot
Watching the animals run around, with not too many worries
Listening to the old folk tell about 307 different stories (most of them are the same stories he/ she told the day before)
Building a fire in the front yard, just to keep the bugs from ruining the party
If you have some food, at least 4 people, some music, and alcohol, then you have a successful party
Women sitting outside,(IN THE FRONT YARD) WITHOUT the worries of putting their hair on or in
Everyone damn near knows everyone, even if not, we are waving at the cars driving in
Not really giving a damn about who has more than the other
What I got, you got, we are all just like sisters and brothers..
Taking a hoe bath is like a daily thing, especially if you know you are not done with the day
You may either have to go back out to do more work, or maybe just go back out to play
NOW, most just may be a little behind on life, and some even out of touch with reality
Well for the city folk, that is just a formality.
Respect is a given, or there is an object to the head, coming flying through the air.
I dare a child to talk back to a grown-up,  oooohhhhh what a cross he/she will bare
Country living, some can do it, some will not, as for me, there is nothing more pure
Will I move back to the country, hands down, I would for sure….

"xpressurself"

I Would Have Been Just Fine

why did you come that day, i think i still would have been OK
minding my own business, chilling and drinking, no mood to play
was not interested in anyone in the place, didn't give a phuck about getting laid
just wanted to listen to the music that was playing, otherwise at home i would have stayed
ssssshhhhiiiiitttttt, i would have been alright just looking
i would have been just fine
i go to certain spots just for the music, but to get hitched and laid, i never waste my time
but hey, this is a day and the life of a nigga that gets exactly what he ask for
i remember praying for something specific, and my father in heaven, he gives me this and  more
standing up, rocking a bit to the groove that was surrounding the place
trying my damndest not to pay attention to the distraction that was in my face
yea i would have been OK just looking
i would have been just fine
but i did not take into account an attraction that was predestined, an attraction that was right on time.
i would have been OK, just looking... i would have been just fine....
before i was given a name or relation i walked in with you in my eye

Author Unknown......... Teach me to Speak****************************

The most powerful thing in the world, is the thing given to us by God himself, and it is the one thing that can lift us higher than the skies, and at the same time, destroys more things than a nuclear bomb has ever been capable of

One of the smaller members of the human body that can give us a sense of peace, fire of rage, or expression of joy and love.

The things that can range from one to plenty and could possibly mean the same thing

The giver of life, or the destroyer of life, the peace in the air, or the heartache despaired, the emotions in the songs we sing.

These things are words, and either written or spoken, the one thing that scares me, and the same thing that i have so many of that i have placed on mute

Afraid to express it, with the fear of being tested, because most of these words talk about the things i have gone through

Me writing this stuff is good for me, but what about those that need to hear this stuff; there may be someone at the edge of their peek

So I ask my father in Heaven to remove this fear of opening my mouth, for the sake of lifting others, would you please teach me to speak.....

For the longest time, i have been in Moses zone, making excuses why i should not open my mouth

People are being trapped in their little box, and are afraid to let themselves out.

Appearing to be strong, and they are only expressing a lie, and deep inside, they are actually weak

So I come to you in the name of Jesus, Lord please teach me to speak

So what if i have no one standing by my side as i express the truth,and/or opinions that reside in my heart

so what, If i bomb out the first time,  somewhere i've got to start

Whether on a stage the size of a dog house, or in the middle of the street

Lord I am asking you for the desire of my heart, open my mouth, and please teach me to speak

There are women in my heart that stay on my mind that have been physically and mentally raped, physically, and verbally abused by these BITCH made NOTHING ASS male figures

My dudes are angry and lost, dead men walking, because we had no liable father figure

The maestro,  Michelangelo came down and blessed us on earth with his crew dressed in black and blue creating a national masterpiece splashing the color of blood all over our streets

sometimes i feel like their only hope, but i need you Lord to teach me to speak

oh yea, i can make you laugh and stuff just to make you stop thinking about some things for a certain period of time

But that stuff always seem to come back, because it is still in their hearts, and WE are always looking for a sign

We have to fight Satan and ourselves, and it always seems that neither one of the two can be beat

But only if I could just speak a word from you, and with that, Lord i need you to teach me to speak

The one thing that challenges me, are the thoughts of everything that i have inside of me, and all that i have written from the inside of me, to just be erased and blown

I do not want to die with journals full of words, and be placed on a world stage, with salutation saying " Author unknown"

I only need a word from you God, so Father speak to my heart, allow me to decrease as you increase

And for the sake of those that need a word from  you, I only need you to teach me to speak..... 

"xpressurself"

The Death of a Sinner

He knew that time was coming, his mind and his heart was prepared

He was ready to do something, that only a few would have dared

He prayed for that moment, when his life mattered the most

That mirror he carried for the past 2 years, would soon carry his ghost

He laid down, tired… torn… weary… and scorned

Looking back over his life and realized, there will be many to mourn

Many things have been done to his spirit, to get him to this point

Actually happy about this day, he states “I’M UP OUT THIS JOINT”

His head lifts up, looking towards the sky, slowly going back, and back, and back

All of a sudden, everything is in slow motion, there was one person bracing, and the other was performing the act.

From the first sin, which was the time of his birth, to the day before his last mile

All of these things rushed in his mind, dang he had been in sin for a while

He never said goodbye to his homies, his family, his friends, nor anyone of utter importance

This was something he knew he had coming, and it was inevitable that he would be here with no utterance

His head finally felt something hit, but he had not yet been released to his destination

 Fear started to set in, and he was slightly paralyed, but this was his obligation

Why were there still thoughts being processed, I thought at impact this would all be done

Why aren’t I at my final destination, God and I should be one

Instead there was only a liner that has been peeled off and left behind

A part of him had been laid to rest,  then a part of him was carefully defined

You see, a man like this had done some things, and he figured this was the only way to make it right

This was the only way he knew to get out of that life,  and he did not put up a fight.

The Kingdom of God has won a new soul, washed and cleansed from his dirt and mess

He had accepted to be delivered, being washed by the blood of Christ, anyone that makes it that far is blessed

 There was a death to a sinner being performed to a man, right before my eyes

He came out of the water, refreshed, a new man, on a new path, for he had just been baptized....

"xpressurself"