Wednesday, September 7, 2011

I am trying...... it really does not matter

Father i am trying to be patient, and I am trying
but the urge is too strong for me, and there is no need in denying
Even when she is not in my eyesight i smell her scent
when i look around, to search for her, once again i am wondering where she went
i have spent a great deal of my life with distractions that i incurred on my own
and each time you come around, there goes another, and when i look up each time you are gone
God sends you back around for a reason
Even now, i really do not understand, but dammit I am definitely listening
now, i have prayed for many things, and each time i have received
This is one thing I thought wouldn’t even be a thought because of the time between
Now you have placed me in positions where i have learned who I am
Finally I know what i am to do, my purpose in life, but why now, i mean mmmaaannn
Yes you have given me my assignment, and you have taught me patience to the 5th power
you have taught me how and when to silence myself, and to stop trying to be the man of the hour
I have always known how to accept the good with the bad
to get what I get and take care of it, no matter what it is i had
God I am asking you to grant me my life with what i have encountered for close to 20 years
grant me the excitement and calmness that i feel EACH time she comes near
This is the only woman that i can honestly say that I would snatch my frik’n heart out and give it to her is she needed it
and would not even worry about replacing it
what i have which is not much is all for her
her  mistakes, issues, her situation i will not take it, but together we will deal with it
hell i will help you with that monkey, but i will not invest it
I mean, we made our own individual beds, but i do not see why we cannot lie on that mattress together
We can fight this shit, whenever, however, forever
I am just praying God allows us to do it..... TOGETHER...... HOWEVER... WHENEVER.... TOGETHER....
with blood sweat and tears..... To me, it really does not matter

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